vaginal bidoof
by James Vincent
Summary: vaginal bidoof


**INT. VAGINAL BIDOOF - AFTERNOON**

Vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof VAGINAL BIDOOF VAGINAL BIDOOF VAGINAL BIDOOF is arguing with vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof VAGINAL BIDOOF VAGINAL BIDOOF VAGINAL BIDOOF. VAGINAL BIDOOF tries to hug VAGINAL BIDOOF but she shakes him off.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Please vaginal bidoof, don't leave me.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I'm sorry vaginal bidoof, but I'm looking for somebody a bit more brave. Somebody who faces his fears head on, instead of running away.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I am such a person!

VAGINAL BIDOOF frowns.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I'm sorry, vaginal bidoof. I just don't feel excited by this relationship anymore.

VAGINAL BIDOOF leaves.

VAGINAL BIDOOF sits down, looking defeated.

Moments later, vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof VAGINAL BIDOOF VAGINAL BIDOOF VAGINAL BIDOOF barges in looking flustered.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Goodness, vaginal bidoof! Is everything okay?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I'm afraid not.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
What is it? Don't keep me in suspense...

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
It's ... a vaginal bidoof ... I saw an evil vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof a bunch of vaginal bidoof!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
 _Defenseless_ vaginal bidoof?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Yes, defenseless vaginal bidoof!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Bloomin' heck, vaginal bidoof! We've got to do something.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I agree, but I wouldn't know where to start.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
You can start by telling me where this happened.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I was...

VAGINAL BIDOOF fans herself and begins to wheeze.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Focus vaginal bidoof, focus! Where did it happen?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
vaginal bidoof! That's right - vaginal bidoof!

VAGINAL BIDOOF springs up and begins to run.

 **EXT. A ROAD - CONTINUOUS**

VAGINAL BIDOOF rushes along the street, followed by VAGINAL BIDOOF. They take a short cut through some back gardens, jumping fences along the way.

 **EXT. VAGINAL BIDOOF - SHORTLY AFTER**

VAGINAL BIDOOF VAGINAL BIDOOF a vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof terrorises two vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF, closely followed by VAGINAL BIDOOF, rushes towards VAGINAL BIDOOF, but suddenly stops in his tracks.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
What is is? What's the matter?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
That's not just any old vaginal bidoof, that's vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Who's vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Who's vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof? _Who's vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof?_ Only the most vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof in the universe!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Blinkin' knickers, vaginal bidoof! We're going to need some help if we're going to stop the most vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof in the universe!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
You can say that again.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Blinkin' knickers, vaginal bidoof! We're going to need some help if we're going to stop the most vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof in the universe!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I'm going to need vaginal bidoof, lots of vaginal bidoof.

vaginal bidoof turns and sees vaginal bidoof and vaginal bidoof. She grins an evil grin.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof, we meet again.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
You've met?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Yes. It was a long, long time ago...

 **EXT. A PARK - BACK IN TIME**

A young VAGINAL BIDOOF is sitting in a park listening to some vaginal bidoof music, when suddenly a dark shadow casts over him.

He looks up and sees VAGINAL BIDOOF. He takes off his headphones.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Would you like some vaginal bidoof?

VAGINAL BIDOOF's eyes light up, but then he studies VAGINAL BIDOOF more closely, and looks uneasy.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I don't know, you look kind of vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Me? No. I'm not vaginal bidoof. I'm the least vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof in the world.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Wait, you're a vaginal bidoof?

VAGINAL BIDOOF runs away, screaming.

 **EXT. VAGINAL BIDOOF - PRESENT DAY**

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
You were a coward then, and you are a coward now.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
(To VAGINAL BIDOOF) You ran away?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
(To VAGINAL BIDOOF) I was a young child. What was I supposed to do?

VAGINAL BIDOOF turns to VAGINAL BIDOOF.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I may have run away from you then, but I won't run away this time!

VAGINAL BIDOOF runs away.

He turns back and shouts.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I mean, I _am_ running away, but I'll be back - _with vaginal bidoof_.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I'm not scared of you.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
You should be.

 **INT. VAGINAL BIDOOF - LATER THAT DAY**

VAGINAL BIDOOF and VAGINAL BIDOOF walk around searching for something.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I feel sure I left my vaginal bidoof somewhere around here.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Are you sure? It does seem like an odd place to keep deadly vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
You know nothing vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
We've been searching for ages. I really don't think they're here.

Suddenly, VAGINAL BIDOOF appears, holding a pair of vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Looking for something?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Crikey, vaginal bidoof, she's got your vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Tell me something I don't already know!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
The earth's circumference at the equator is about 40,075 km.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I know that already!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
(appalled) Dude!

While VAGINAL BIDOOF is looking at VAGINAL BIDOOF with disgust, VAGINAL BIDOOF lunges forward and grabs his deadly vaginal bidoof. He wields them, triumphantly.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Prepare to die, you vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
No please! All I did was vaginal bidoof a bunch of vaginal bidoof!

VAGINAL BIDOOF enters, unseen by any of the others.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I cannot tolerate that kind of behaviour! Those vaginal bidoof were defenceless! Well now they have a defender - and that's me! vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof defender of innocent vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Don't hurt me! Please!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Give me one good reason why I shouldn't use these vaginal bidoof on you right away!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Because vaginal bidoof, I am your mother.

VAGINAL BIDOOF looks stunned for a few moments, but then collects himself.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
No you're not!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Ah well, it had to be worth a try.

VAGINAL BIDOOF tries to grab the vaginal bidoof but VAGINAL BIDOOF dodges out of the way.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Who's the mummy now? Huh? _Huh?_

Unexpectedly, VAGINAL BIDOOF slumps to the ground.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Did she just faint?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I think so. Well that's disappointing. I was rather hoping for a more dramatic conclusion, involving my deadly vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF crouches over VAGINAL BIDOOF's body.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Be careful, vaginal bidoof. It could be a trick.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
No, it's not a trick. It appears that... It would seem... vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof is dead!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
What?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Yes, it appears that I scared her to death.

VAGINAL BIDOOF claps her hands.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
So your vaginal bidoof did save the day, after all.

VAGINAL BIDOOF steps forward.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Is it true? Did you kill the vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
vaginal bidoof how long have you been...?

VAGINAL BIDOOF puts her arm around VAGINAL BIDOOF.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Long enough.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Then you saw it for yourself. I killed vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Then the vaginal bidoof are safe?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
It does seem that way!

A crowd of vulnerable vaginal bidoof enter, looking relived.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
You are their hero.

The vaginal bidoof bow to VAGINAL BIDOOF.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
There is no need to bow to me. I seek no worship. The knowledge that vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof will never vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof ever again, is enough for me.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
You are humble as well as brave!

One of the vaginal bidoof passes VAGINAL BIDOOF a vaginal bidoof vaginal bidoof

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I think they want you to have it, as a symbol of their gratitude.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I couldn't possibly.

Pause.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Well, if you insist.

VAGINAL BIDOOF takes the vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Thank you.

The vaginal bidoof bow their heads once more, and leave.

VAGINAL BIDOOF turns to VAGINAL BIDOOF.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Does this mean you want me back?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Oh, vaginal bidoof, of course I want you back!

VAGINAL BIDOOF smiles for a few seconds, but then looks defiant.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Well you can't have me.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
 _WHAT?_

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
You had no faith in me. You had to see my scare a vaginal bidoof to death before you would believe in me. I don't want a lover like that.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
But...

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Please leave. I want to spend time with the one person who stayed with me through thick and thin - my best friend, vaginal bidoof.

VAGINAL BIDOOF grins.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
But...

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
You heard the gentleman. Now be off with you. Skidaddle! Shoo!

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
vaginal bidoof?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
I'm sorry vaginal bidoof, but I think you _should_ skidaddle.

VAGINAL BIDOOF leaves.

VAGINAL BIDOOF turns to VAGINAL BIDOOF.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Did you mean that? You know ... that I'm your best friend?

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
Of course you are!

The two walk off arm in arm.

Suddenly VAGINAL BIDOOF stops.

VAGINAL BIDOOF  
When I said vaginal bidoof, you know I was just trying to distract the vaginal bidoof don't you?

THE END


End file.
